“Speaking your truth” is a popular phrase right now. But what does it actually mean?
by: Brad Cullum, MA, LPC, NCC, EMDR
When people talk about “your truth,” it can sound like, If you believe it, it must be true. On the other side, some respond with, Facts don’t care about your feelings.
In counseling, neither of those extremes captures what we mean.
Many clients believe they are being honest because they are recounting events accurately. They can describe what was said, what happened, and even why they think they felt a certain way. But often, there is a deeper layer of truth that never gets spoken.
I once had a client tell me she had a great conversation with her husband. She said she explained how she felt and why. I thought, “That’s wonderful.” As she continued, she shared the deeper fears and longings underneath her reaction. So I asked, “What did your husband say when you told him that?”
She paused. “Well… I didn’t tell him that. I was too scared.”
That is the moment where “speaking your truth” becomes real.
We often stop at the safe version of honesty. We share the facts. We might even share a surface emotion. But we withhold the vulnerable truth — the fear of not being chosen, the loneliness, the insecurity, the unmet need.
Emotional truth is not the same thing as objective fact. It doesn’t mean our interpretation is perfectly accurate. It means we are naming what is genuinely happening inside us. That internal experience is real — and it is often the key to deeper connection.
Many relationships fall short of intimacy because we avoid sharing those hidden layers. We protect ourselves from possible rejection, misunderstanding, or conflict. But in doing so, we also prevent others from truly knowing us.
Learning to identify and express that deeper truth takes courage. It requires slowing down, understanding what you’re actually feeling, and choosing to step out of hiding.
A therapist’s office is often the safest place to begin practicing this. It’s where you can sort through your emotional world, learn how to use your voice appropriately, and build the confidence to bring that honesty into your relationships.
Because being known — not just understood on the surface, but truly known — is where real connection begins.
ARE YOU SEEKING HELP WITH “SPEAKING YOUR TRUTH”?
Harvest Counseling & Wellness is a mental health counseling practice in Argyle, Texas. We provide therapy for couples, individuals, and families who are struggling with issues related to anxiety, depression, abuse, and grief due to damaged relationships. Our office is located near Denton, Highland Village, Flower Mound, Lantana, Roanoke, and Justin. If you are looking for a therapist in Denton or surrounding areas, contact us today for a complimentary phone consultation, 940-294-7061.
